Commitment Ceremonies
Commitment ceremonies and wedding ceremonies are similar in many ways - you are declaring your love and commitment to each other in front of your family and friends. Hurray!
You may want your celebration to look and feel like a traditional wedding or you might prefer the complete opposite. It’s entirely up to you. Your ceremony can be as simple or as opulent as you would like – both can be splendid! Importantly, your ceremony can take place whenever and wherever you want as there are no legal requirements or documentation needed.
This is where you can really personalise your day – and one of the joys of having a celebrant led celebration as the sky’s the limit!
From a simple exchange of vows and rings to a more symbolic ceremony including poems, readings, music, and rituals, I’ll help you every step of the way, creating a bespoke ceremony just for you.
That’s right - everything from the entrance and where you wish to stand or sit, the words and rituals, right through to the exit and the all-important confetti shot.
How it all happens
It’s important that you find the right celebrant for you. After all, this will be one of the biggest moments of your life. To help with your decision, I’m very happy to have a no-obligation chat. We can discuss any thoughts you have around your ceremony plans and get to know each other a little to make sure the chemistry is right, and to check dates for availability.
Let’s talk…
Like anything worth doing well, there is a little groundwork to do. I’ll set you some homework – a short questionnaire – and ideally, we would then arrange to meet in person at the ceremony location, but when this is not possible, we can meet somewhere else convenient to you, or arrange a video call. This gives me the opportunity to learn more about you as a couple, hear your unique love story and help you to create your perfect day with a tailor-made ceremony that speaks to your past, present and your future.
Getting to know you…
This is where you can really personalise your day – and one of the joys of having a celebrant led celebration as the sky’s the limit!
From the reading of vows and ring exchange to hand-fasting, jump the broom, oathing stones and tree planting, rituals like these can really help define the moment and make your ceremony special. And they can be a lot of fun in the making and delivery of for you and me too.
So, how do you go about choosing the perfect one for your commitment ceremony? Have a look at these. If one or a few, or a variation on any of them are what you’re looking for, then together, we can make it happen. If none of them are quite your thing, then that’s fine too.
Ceremony…
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Vow Exchange Ritual
An opportunity to declare your love for each other, in front of family, friends and/or witnesses.
Ring Exchange Ritual
Dating back to ancient Egypt, with the ring serving as a symbol of the couple's eternal love, this is a ritual that is the backbone of almost every kind of ceremony, as the couple exchange rings and pledge their commitment to one another.
And if rings are not your thing, you can always exchange something else as a token of your love. A flower perhaps, a memento of your journey to now, or favourite photograph? Anything goes.
Candle-Lighting Ritual
This is popular when having a secular celebrant led ceremony but would like to add a familiar element for religious family members. What’s great about this is it can make them feel more included, or even integral to the proceedings. The ritual finds the couple, or their parents, lighting one common candle from two individual candles, symbolising your union. Best for indoor ceremonies though, just in case there is a breeze!
Sand-Pouring Ritual
A variation on the candle-lighting, sand-pouring sees you pouring sand from two small glass bottles into a single vase or vessel to symbolise your union. The sand can come from a special place of interest, perhaps a local beach, or you can use coloured sands to create a decorative item to display for the years to come. It's also a great one to include a couple of members of the family or your wedding party in as they each add some sand, symbolising the joining of families, or as homage to your enduring friendships.
Hand-Fasting Ritual or "Tying the Knot"
The hand-fasting ritual, an ancient Celtic tradition and where the old saying ‘tying the knot’ comes from, sees you standing face to face, as I or a family member binds your hands with a special length of material, as a symbol of your commitment. I can provide the knot, or you can. Have a think what you might like to use if this lovely ritual is for you.
Salt-Pouring Ritual
Well, everything tastes better with a bit of salt! Used metaphorically to signify permanence, loyalty, durability, fidelity, usefulness, value, and purification, the salt ritual is great for food lovers. It involves you and your partner pouring salt from two individual containers into a single vessel to symbolise your union. You can even try to source salt locally as an extra nice touch.
If salt isn’t your thing, then my variation on this – a Shot for Love or Sip of Fizz ritual – works equally well. You each pour a shot of a favourite drink for the other and raise a glass to each other’s happiness in your union. Well, if I had my wedding again, I’d incorporate it! Good one to steady the nerves after all that planning and to get the party started!
Oathing Stone Ritual
While reciting your vows you’ll be holding the oathing stone – one you have chosen and that is special to you – figuratively setting your love in stone together. I rather like the simplicity and symbolism of this one. And every time you visit a pebble beach, you’ll be reminded of your fab day.
Ring-Warming Ritual
This ritual creates a wonderful moment, unifying the whole congregation as the rings are passed around in a small pouch to be "warmed up" by the guests as they each set an intention or wish for you. Obviously, depending on the size of the guest list, you might just want immediate family or the wedding party to warm them for you…or you might be late for the wedding breakfast!
You can also do this warming and intention wishing if having a rope/ tying the knot ritual or the oathing stone. You share the item around the guests instead of the rings.
Jump the Broom Ritual
This fun ritual symbolises a new beginning, whilst sweeping away the past. After your wedding vows, you quite literally jump into your new life together, leaving the past behind you. Great fun for all to witness and to cheer you on – and for the photo album!
Love Letter, Time Capsule & Wine Box Rituals
For these rituals you can mix and match or select just one element. You’ll bring a specially selected bottle of wine, love letters, or mementos of wonderful times – or each of them – to put into a box and seal it during the ceremony. I would then explain your pledge to open the box – and the wine if included – perhaps one or ten years from now to celebrate an anniversary.
Tree-planting Ritual
Planting a tree or favourite plant represents your relationship, which is about to take root, grow and flourish. It’s a lovely one to include if you’re planning on getting married at home, or near-by. Some venues will allow it as it might encourage you to return for a visit or two! If not planting in the ground, then a planter also works well, and you can take it home with you.
Guard of Honour
This is a great way to get creative. The Guard of Honour can be before – particularly if no-one is being ‘walked’ down an aisle – or after the ceremony. Or both! Friends and/or family holding something aloft to create a canopy for the couple to pass through is the order of the day here. From ceremonial swords, to burning smoking sage sticks for a spiritual cleanse, and throwing eco-confetti – the choice is yours!
Bread Ritual
Another one for food lovers, or hungry couples who skipped a full breakfast! These rituals are popular in many cultures, often symbolising the couple's prosperity. Family or guests offer the couple a special loaf of bread in the hope that they'll never go hungry – I like to say for love! Combined with the Salt and Shot of Love rituals above, a bread ritual can also create a food theme at your ceremony. If you wanted me to, I could even share the traditional housewarming blessing, "Bread, that this house may never know hunger. Salt, that life may always have flavour. And wine, that joy and prosperity may reign forever.” We can tweak as you please…
Loving Cup Ritual or Quaich Ritual
Symbolising trust, togetherness and life-long unity, this is usually sharing a drink from a two-handled silver cup or an heirloom cup or glass called a quaich - pronounced quake. Sometimes offered to wedding party guests too, the idea is that a drink shared to toast to your past, present and future, is sweeter. Note for the nervous: Watch out for red wine spills on lovely white wedding dresses and dress shirts! A jug of mojito with straws also works!
Bell Ringing Ritual
Ringing bells is thought to bring in good luck and prosperity for newly-married couples – a happy sound-bath for all. Small handbells tuned to different notes make a joyful sound when rung by your guests at the end of the ceremony and is certainly joyous and celebratory. Kids can get involved too, allowing them to make some proper noise – a great reward for being well behaved during the ceremony!
The choice is yours.
I’ll provide a first draft of the ceremony script about eight weeks ahead of the big day, leaving time for a few tweaks if needed so it is exactly what you want. Then, my early gift to you, is that you can cross the ceremony off your to-do list. Hurrah! And have peace of mind that this special part of the day is ready to be enjoyed. Roles assigned, readings agreed, music chosen, vows and rituals ready to look forward to. Tick, tick, tick.
When decisions have been made…
I love to have a phone call or a zoom a week before the big day. This is a great opportunity to catch up with you and check through the ceremony one last time ‘for belt and braces’.
I also offer an optional rehearsal video-call, or an in-person dry run (perhaps with a steadying glass of something) at the venue. It’s optional because not everyone wants to rehearse, but you might take extra comfort in that. If so, your wish is my command.
Of course, if you’d prefer not to have the ceremony script in advance at all and are game for a big reveal on the day, then that is fine too. Exciting!
Catch-up...
Relax and enjoy! I will be excited to see you again and will arrive early to help calm any nerves and liaise with your venue manager and suppliers like musicians or the photographer, to ensure that your ceremony space is just right and that it runs smoothly. I also like to have a quick chat with others in your celebration party, such as speakers, and key friends and family involved in your ceremony.
It’s your day. Together we’ll make it more wonderful.
Following the ceremony, I will slip off quietly into the sunset so you can enjoy the rest of the day.
Or… if you would like, you can keep me on as an extra pair of hands for the ceremony banquet announcements – speaker intros, cake cutting and the first dance!
On the day...
Enjoy! Yes - that’s it! As it’s a commitment ceremony to declare your love, you won’t need to remember to visit your local registrar to make it all legally binding.
Finally…
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How much?
Don’t worry about spiralling costs. I will provide you with a personalised quote based on our no-obligation chat about your ceremony and promise to be clear and upfront about anything that may be an additional cost.
In principle…
Commitment Ceremonies
2024 £7502025 £795
2026 £850, or £795 if booked by 1 February 2025.
Please add £150 for Bank Holidays and Bank Holiday weekends.
To secure your date, all I ask for is a 25% Booking Fee, and then you can be certain that no other ceremonies will be in my diary on your special day!
Includes…
· An initial complimentary 30-minute chat, either face to face on video chat or by phone
· A little homework (two get-to-know-you questionnaires)
· A video call or preferably a face to face visit a few months before the ceremony at the venue
· Writing of the ceremony script with tweaking rounds as needed to ensure it’s exactly what you want
· Help to write your vows and with choices of music, readings and rituals
· Liaison with your venue and event planner before the ceremony
· A check-in with you ahead of the big day – perhaps to also run through the script
· My early attendance before the ceremony to check-in with venue, sound tech, musicians, photographer, party planner etc
· My officiating the ceremony
· A printed copy of the script and personalised ceremony certificate signed during the ceremony (if you wish) for you to keep as a memento
· Confidence that I am a professionally trained Celebrant in Wedding and Funeral Celebrancy in the UK
· Assurance that I am accredited by, and a member of, the International College of Professional Celebrants, as recognised by the National Open Colleges Network (NOCN)Optional extras
Ceremony script rehearsal – £95 (per hour), in person availability permitting.
Speeches – from £250 per person for help developing and writing your speeches to ensure your comfort and ease with this memory making moment on your special day. Includes top tips on public speaking.
Announcer after the ceremony - £450
I would be incredibly happy to help marshal the rest of your day’s proceedings if you need an extra pair of hands! This includes to act as MC during the feast that follows and until the first dance, including for example:
· marshalling you to escape for a quiet moment - if you so wish - to reflect on the day so far· advising guests when to make their way into the drinks or dining area
· announcing the arrival of the happy couple – that’s you!
· introducing the speakers and their speeches
· announcing the cutting of the cake and the first danceP.S. You don’t have to feed me! Table planning is hard enough without having to find a spot for me. I’ll be working anyway!
Other
Travel – there is no charge for travel within a 45 mile radius of my home in Henley on Thames; outside of this, travel is charged at the standard rate of £0.45 per mile.
Other reasonable travel and any accommodation costs if required are to be paid for on behalf of the Celebrant – thank you!